September: A Month Of Good Things

Autumn is upon us.

For some it’s a harbinger of doom. A time to dread, autumn snatches away the golden days of summer, offering nothing but cold, dreary days without joy. To others it’s a time to celebrate scarves and pumpkin spice, boots and rom-coms, cooler weather and holiday goodness to come.

To me, autumn has always been about family. A time when—despite the hustle of life—we have opportunities to slow down and be together: carving pumpkins, baking pies, watching movies. As the desert attempts to free itself of hot nights and even hotter days, autumn offers hope.

Last year around this time I did not embrace hope. I allowed myself to drown in a sea of self-doubt and despair. Focusing on all the wrong things, I was controlled by every single one of my negative feelings and thoughts—my autumn joy stolen.

If there’s one thing life has taught me it's that hope is fragile.

Being a positive person might appear easy to those standing outside looking in. But let me assure you, it is not. Every second must be a driving force toward seeking the positives in life. No matter how small and fragile they may feel.

At times, it feels like a foolish endeavor—backhanded comments people make can leave you feeling silly, impractical, lacking. In these moments I am learning to accept others' opinions of me as just that: opinions. Their assumptions of what they *think* it means to be a positive person. Not reality.

This September I struggled with doubts and fears. Just as I did last year. The difference is I embraced my positives without shame, tuning out the misconceptions.

Instead, I talked about the books I love and acknowledged that while there are some who think my bookish taste is childish and silly, that’s their problem not mine. I revised Magic Story Of Magic and accepted the fact that it’s a love story—plain and simple. It won’t change the world and some might think it’s ridiculous. That’s okay. It’s mine and I love it. I slowed down and ignored the comments about how great it must be to be a stay-at-home mom with so much free time on my hands. My family knows how hard I work and I know how hard I work too. That’s all that matters. I embraced my love of mismatched socks and young adult books and didn’t feel the need to hide the fact that I still long to be Rainbow Brite. My age has never dictated what I do, say, or love. So why start now?

But mostly I took a step back and thought about what is important to me: being honest or being what everyone thinks I should be?

September was a good month filled with doubts and struggles and fears. It taught me once again that life isn’t perfect and it isn’t fair, but it is good. And the good you have to fight for. A lesson I learned long ago from my friend Ashley Morgan. It’s a lesson I’ll continue to learn day in and day out.

Happy autumn, friends. I hope it brings you joy. No matter how big or small that joy might be, I hope it gets you through the cold dreary days ahead filled with pumpkin spice everything and all the holiday hustle and bustle life brings your way.

May: A Time Of Reflection And Moving Forward

Next month All The What Ifs will turn three and a half years old, making me a published author for just as long. While my journey down the path of publication hasn’t been picture perfect, I can say without hesitation the decision to publish All The What Ifs was one of the best decisions I have made. Along the way I have learned some things.

Here’s a few:

Publishing a book is not for the weak of heart.

Whether you’re self-published (like me) or traditionally published, committing to publishing a novel filled with little pieces of yourself for the world to judge is terrifying. From the naysayers who will tell you it’s too hard to the people who will avoid you, there will be moments you’ll feel like a fool for even trying. Dark moments when it feels like the only person who cares about your book being published is you and maybe that’s why you should just give up.

And here’s my advice to fellow writers who are struggling right now: Fight harder. You caring matters most. And it’s a worthy reason to work toward publishing a book. So tune out those naysayers, find your tribe, and hold tight to your dream. It’s worthy. You are worthy. Now work your ass off to achieve that goal.

You might want to hide and that doesn’t make you weak.

Being honest with the people in my life about publishing has been a difficult journey. From the people who doubted I could write a coherent sentence (and let me know), to family and friends who would flat-out ignore me when I talked about writing a book, to those who have judged me for my subject matters or the genre I’ve chosen to publish, my default has been to hide my head in the sand and never, ever discuss my books.

Which is a shame, since I love my characters and I’m proud of my books. So here’s more unsolicited advice to any fellow authors out there feeling the desire to hide: Don’t. Pull your head out of the sand, stand up tall and proud, and look the world straight in the face (even if your brain is screaming at you to shove your head back in the sand). Again: keep pushing forward.

You matter. Your book matters. Do the thing.

It’s that simple and that terrifying, my friends. Your book. Your passions. YOU matter. There’s no right or wrong book to publish. There’s no worthy or unworthy story. Twilight is as worthy as To Kill A Mockingbird. Don’t believe I know what I’m talking about? Then don’t take my word for it, here’s a few published authors who agree:

Sylvia Plath: And by the way, everything in life is writable about if you have the outgoing guts to do it, and the imagination to improvise. The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt.

Neil Gaiman: The one thing that you have that nobody else has is you. Your voice, your mind, your story, your vision. So write and draw and build and play and dance and live as only you can.

Madeleine L’Engle: You have to write the book that wants to be written. And if the book will be too difficult for grown-ups, then you write it for children.

So write, my friends. Write because you love it. Write because you care. Write because only you can tell your story. Don’t worry about the rules. Don’t worry about what people will think or say. Shove aside the voices in your head and all the people around you making you doubt your goals and create a book you are proud of. Then publish the damn thing, one way or another.

Remember: Be you. Warts and all. The world is a better place for it. And your dream is oh-so-very-worthy.

April: A Month Of Planning And Plotting

Of Lies and Zombies turned one-year-old this month! For what feels like forever, I worked hard on writing, editing, and publishing All The What Ifs and Of Lies and Zombies. It sucked up all my writing time and plotting energy. And if I'm honest, completely sapped me.

Yet during that time I had plenty of new story ideas. With my first two books shipped off into the great big world of publishing, it’s time to get back into the swing of exploring new ideas and finishing up current works in progress.

What are these stories? I’m glad you asked!

Magic Story of Magic (a working title): Magic Story of Magic is an adult fiction romance/coming of age story about a young woman named Lily Banks. Magic Story of Magic is a blast to write. It’s rooted in the real world, but filled with impossible magic tricks. It has lame jokes and kissing and to repeat MAGIC TRICKS (a thing I’m having far too much fun writing). The first draft of Magic Story is SO CLOSE to being done. I'll have updates on the cover, book blurb, and more soon!

Something Dumb To Do (the third book of the Richmond High series): The third book in the Richmond High series Something Dumb To Do is Quinn’s story. Told is a present and past switch off, Something Dumb To Do is the story of a girl trying to avoid her parents’ mistakes, while she denies the pesky truth that sometimes the past isn’t what we perceived. The first draft of Something Dumb To Do is roughly halfway complete and will include characters from All The What Ifs and Of Lies and Zombies! But I ain’t sharing who. Something Dumb To Do’s cover is already in the works. It’s so stinking cute, and I can’t wait to share it.

Book Four of the Richmond High series: This book has me in knots already, and I can’t say much about it yet. But here’s what I will share: Ashley Morgan is back but as a secondary character who will play a pivotal role in a high school girl’s life as she faces a major, life alerting decision. Sound familiar? Kind of. And that’s all I will say for now.

I’ve got more ideas in the works (for example an adult fiction with a social media twist and a fantasy story inspired by a Death Cab for Cutie song). I could keep going, but we'd be here for a long time.

Not only have I been plotting new stories, but I am blogging regularly again! There are four new monthly features on Ang Writes: Ang’s Top Five which features five books based on a random theme, a book review of an indie favorite, On My E-reader a shout out to the ebooks I’ve bought but haven’t read yet, and a monthly wrap up that's ever changing.

It’s a year of words, my friends! Reconnecting with the joy of writing just for fun without strings attached or publishing goals looming over my head. It’s amazing and freeing. And I can’t wait to share more with you all soon!

If you'd like to keep up with all my publishing news, sign up for my newsletter!

Newsletter Exclusive: A Brand New All The What Ifs Bonus Chapter

That's right, folks! This month's exclusive content for my newsletter subscribers is an All The What Ifs bonus chapter.

Not the exclusive All The What Ifs bonus chapter from Lucas's point of view at the back of Of Lies and Zombies, which I'm sure you've all read (*wink wink*) and loved! But a brand new scene that takes place the day before from Ashley's point of view. And y'all thought Christmas was over!

What's that? You'd like a little taste of what's to come? I guess if you insist:

what if ... we fell apart?

“Stop hoarding the cookie butter, Ashley. Or we’ll be beefing.”
Ashley Morgan looked up from the paper plate cradled in her lap, her eyes locking on her best friend Natalie. The clear blue sky overhead gazed down on the friends. The afternoon sun baked into the ground. Heat hung heavy in the air, leeching life out of the world, turning the grass brown, cracking the soil.
Ashley’s eyes narrowed on Natalie who jabbed a plastic knife at her.
“Beefing,” Natalie repeated, dragging out the word.
“Nat.” Ashley gestured toward the unopened jar of cookie butter on the quilted blanket next to her knee. “I haven’t even opened the jar.”
“I’m staking my claim early.”
“To the whole jar of cookie butter?”
“Cookie butter mine, peanut butter yours. Don’t hate, cause I thought of it first.” Natalie huffed. “And you’re supposed to be the smart one.”
“Clearly I am not.”

Annnnnd scene. Well. Not really. There's more. But my lips are sealed. However, sign-up for my monthly newsletter and you'll receive the rest of this scene in your inbox this week and learn what Natalie and Ashley are up to. Plus when you sign-up you'll be entered for a chance to win an Of Lies and Zombies paperback!

It's a win-win, my friends. Don't think! Sign-up here:

January In Review

January is coming to a close. This month has been an excursion in staying consistent and being a cheerleader for myself. Two things I suck at. But I am determined to fake it until I make it. It’s been a quiet, successful month during which I’ve reconnected with my love of book blogging, worked on making my work a priority, and stayed the course even when my brain screamed at me to quit. Here are a few things that kept me sane along the way.

Good Shows

We started watching Brooklyn 99.
Love. Love. Love. All the characters.
Especially Captain Holt.

Good Music
Like Weezer's Teal Album.
Which I'm in love with and have listened to a billion times.

Good Food

I heart soup.
And winter is the perfect season for it.
Here's a quick, easy Ramen recipe our family adores:

And here's a pic from when we made it last week.

As you can see, we skip the cherry tomatoes.
But mushroom broth is a MUST.
We've tried it without and it's not the same.

Good Books

goodreads

As I mentioned in my top five comfort reads post,
Ms. Allen is an author I reread often.
This month I finished Lost Lake for the millionth time.
When I finished the book, I thought about rereading it. True story.
You can check out the other books I read this month on GoodReads.

Good Words
This month I stopped focusing on word count goals and publishing deadlines. I focused instead on a brand new All The What Ifs bonus chapter. A heads up for those of you who’ve read the All The What Ifs bonus chapter in Of Lies and Zombies, the new scene I am working on takes place the day before and is from Ashley’s perspective! And if that wasn't awesome enough, the new scene will be in next month’s newsletter! You. Are. Welcome.

Writing about Ashley and her friends again felt like coming home. It reminded how much I loved writing All The What Ifs and how excited I am to finish the Richmond High Series.

It’s a solid start to a good year. And I’m thankful for it plus looking forward to next month and the awesome to come.

How was your month, my friends?

ang has got your newsletter sneak peek right here

What you'll find in this month's newsletter:

• an Ang ramble 
• a review and pics of Of Lies and Zombies 
• a pic of the best dog in the world 
• ebook sale info 
• a giveaway winner 
• how to enter a giveaway for an Of Lies and Zombies paperback

Dog Days of Summer 

Summer is in full swing, my friends. The ground is lava. Our trash is unspeakably disgusting. I could go on and on but I will spare you. Summer is that magical time when the world is too bright and brittle and my brain is on overload. Funny how the season that brings so much joy to so many people manages to weigh me down. We humans are weird.

But despite my bah-humbug feelings and longing for not hell outside I've been trying my best to see my world from a new perspective. It's a work in progress. One that's uncomfortable as I come face to face with facts about myself. The most difficult fact I've been struggling with is I do not feel I have the right to publish and so I hide. I hide behind my responsibilities. I hide behind helping others. I hide behind feeling unimportant and not special and no different from everyone else and the weight of other people's responsibilities and problems. I hide because it's been my knee jerk reaction since I was a kid and now I feel stuck. I prefer for people to ignore me and my books. It's my comfort zone. 

Writing is hard. Editing is a nightmare. Publishing is gut-wrenching. But the hardest thing I've struggled with since publishing All The What Ifs is feeling like an impostor.

This isn't a new revelation. However the weight of it is suffocating me. And I'm left with the realization that how I feel is okay, hiding doesn't make me a terrible person, and I am only stuck for as long as I allow myself to be.

As this too bright, too hot, too much summer continues to press down around me, I'm determined more than ever to allow myself the right to these feelings and work toward moving forward. One messy, overthinking step at a time.

Want more?

Heck yeah you do!

Click here to read the rest of this month's newsletter.

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happy birthday is happy

Today is All The What Ifs first birthday!

And it marks another awesome author milestone for yours truly!

This year has been filled with firsts for my debut novel.

First book sold.

First review written.

First time seeing my book in a library.

First time signing a copy of my book.

First time someone told me 

they stayed up allllll night long so they could finish the book.

First giveaway.

First button pack made.

And so so many more.

And it would be IMPOSSIBLE without the support 

of my awesome readers and reviewers!

Without you NONE of this would be possible.

Without you this year filled with milestones and achievements would be nothing.

I wish I could give each and every one of you a huge squeezy hug!!

Thank you.

Thank you.

THANK YOU 

from the tip of my toes to the bottom of my nose.

When I published All The What Ifs I had no clue what would happened.

Would the book get lost in the shuffle?
Would readers hate it?
Would they even give us a chance?

To those of you who gave us a chance: thank you.

To those of you who shared how much you enjoyed the book: thank you.

To those of you who helped keep All The What Ifs 

from getting lost in the shuffle: THANK YOU!

You made this year possible.

And I will always and forever be grateful.

*HUGS ALL AROUND*

p.s. today you can pick up the all the what ifs ebook on amazon for free.

p.p.s. have i expressed how grateful i am?

p.p.p.s. cause i truly truly am.

It's an All The What Ifs giveaway!

Today my debut YA novel All The What Ifs is four-weeks-old! 

So let's have a giveaway in her honor!

link to amazon

link to goodreads

synopsis:

Ashley Morgan is trapped. She’s spent the last three years of high school being groomed to follow in her father’s footsteps. It’s a future she’s unsure of. Yet she tries her hardest to avoid her father’s disapproval while keeping the peace for her high-strung mother and autistic brother. Whenever her fears fester, Ashley works harder.

At the start of her senior year, Ashley reluctantly joins ACT an after-school community service club that is in disarray. The members argue. The advisor sleeps. And Lucas Malone, the club’s president, conjures unwanted memories of freshman year and his disastrous attempt to ask her to homecoming.

Ashley tries to remain uninvolved, but with each success in ACT she gains the confidence to face her future. She sets in motion plans that force her to choose between the bright future her father's mapped out or an unknown path of her own design. When the moment comes to make her choice, she’s plagued with doubt, because what if … she gets it all wrong?

There are three prize packages up for grabs:

Prize One: 1 signed paperback copy of All The What Ifs with a set of pins

Prize Two: 1 eBook copy of All The What Ifs with a set of pins

Prize Three: 1 set of All The What Ifs pins

Enter via the Rafflecopper below by Friday, January 8th at 12 PM PST.

Winners will be announced that afternoon.

This contest is open in the U.S.A. & internationally!

Good luck to all!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

All The What Ifs Cover Reveal & Release Date News

My friends, 

there's absolutely NO way I can write this post coherently.
Thus, I'm gonna keep it simple.

Ladies & gentlemen,

boys & girls,

I PROUDLY present to you my lovely cover

which boasts doodles drawn by my bestie 

and a cover designed by my mister.

But that ain't all the news I've got. 

You can officially 

pre-order the ebook of All The What Ifs 

on Amazon right this very minute!

THAT'S RIGHT ALL THE WHAT IFS IS LIVE ON AMAZON.

When will it be released? 

Thursday, December 3, 2015.

The paperback is in the works and I'll have more news on it soon.

For now, I'm going to sit here and bask in the glow of 

MY BOOK being available ON AMAZON for pre-order.