Thursday, April 4, 2013

Five Sentence Fiction -- WORDS

Five Sentence Fiction is hosted by Lillie Ferrin.
Here's the stone skinny:
Five Sentence Fiction is about packing a powerful punch in a tiny fist. Each week I will post a one word inspiration, then anyone wishing to participate will write a five sentence story based on the prompt word. The word does not have to appear in your five sentences, just use it for direction.
Easy. Peasy. Lemon. Squeezy. Am I right?

You can find Lillie on Twitter here & follow all the Five Sentence Fiction happenings here.

This week's word is: WORDS.

And the following is my humble offerings.
---------------------------------------------------
 Stay

The sound of her voice trickled into his ear-- soft, pleading, broken.

He struggled against the fog that stole her from him and pain greeted him, sharp, cruel pain that poked and prodded him.

“Please stay,” he finally heard.

He became aware of the feel of her hand in his, the rough crisp sheets beneath him, the persistent beeping of a machine, the sharp smell of ammonia and sickness.

Stay, he chanted pushing past panic and fear as he attempted to squeeze her hand, just stay.
---------------------------------------------------

Annnnnnnnd scene!
*dramatic bow*

Make sure to check out this week's participants here.
And don't forget to write your own fic.
Go forth & do good, my friends.
Peace out!

25 comments:

  1. Heart-rending...a moment or two of lucidity amid unconscious fog, I desperately want him to stay!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Firstly I love your site. 2ndly I love your sense of humour and ta daaaaa drum roll I really loved your contribution, you had me gripped from the beginning, hats off to you (if I wore one) :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Awwww shucks! Thank you. *blushes*
      And you ain't so shaby yourself! *high-five*
      But seriously, I'm so glad you liked my wee little story.
      It *heart* Five Sentence Fiction & it's motley crew!

      Delete
  3. I likes stories that make me want to read them twice to get everything out of them. I read yours three times.

    Good job!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's just about the nicest thing anyone's ever said about one of my stories. And I totally, one hundred percent, understand what you are talking about! Thank you, my friend! *high-five*

      Delete
  4. Replies
    1. Is your heart okay?!?!?! *hands you a heart fixer* <-- don't ask. i don't know.

      Thank you for commenting!

      Delete
  5. Exquisitely executed! Love it!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exquisite?! For real?! *stunned* That's an mighty word, and I'm not sure I'm worthy of it, but I'll freaking take it!

      *HUGS*!!!!

      Delete
  6. How about "deep felt emotion" and "great imagery"?
    Scott
    Mine: http://kindredspirit23.wordpress.com/2013/04/05/five-sentence-fiction-prompt-words/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. How about "you're cool beans" and "thank you"?
      *fist bump*

      Delete
  7. Lovely, Ang, just lovely. So few words are as evocative said by themselves as "stay". Powerful ;))

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nor wished... sometimes you just wish, hope, and pray someone will stay.

      Powerful is yet another strong word that makes me feel squirrelly and unworthy, but oh so blessed by awesome friends. Thank you. *hugs*

      Delete
  8. This is beautiful/sad/heart breaking with gorgeous, deep emotion. Can I add any more adjectives????? You make it seem rather 'easy peasy lemon squeezy' xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Add allll the adjectives! ALL OF THEM I SAY!
      And thank you... *blushes*
      I'm so glad you liked it.
      *huggers*

      Delete
  9. Great post says so much in so few words.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Whelp. Thank YOU for reading and commenting, my friend!
      *high-five*!!

      Delete
  10. This was beautiful. :)

    ReplyDelete
  11. Love how you used so much sensory imagery in this. It brought the scene alive even as he lay dying. Very moving.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Adding sensory to these small fics is challenging and my favorite thing to do. In fact, I always look at these as a way to push myself with using as little words as possible to create a full scene.

      And gosh, I'm hoping he doesn't die. *sniffles*

      Thank you so much for reading & commenting! So glad you liked it!

      Delete
  12. Oh my. Five sentences was all it needed to convey so much emotion? Congrats, that was absolutely brilliant!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Okay. By this point, my face is as red as a strawberry! So glad you liked it! Thank you!!

      Delete